Christmas Day

I love Christmastime, more as a parent than I ever did as a child I think. This year, I did most of my shopping online and with free shipping direct to my front door. I wrapped things as they arrived, and was done a few weeks before Christmas, which made this year even more relaxed and fun than ever before. I even had enough spare time to make a few cute homemade gifts. When you have four children, three with birthdays in November and December, you need all the advantages that you can find to help ease the stress.

What I especially love is having my parents here with us for Christmas Eve and morning. I am very close to my mother and stepfather, in fact they are actually my best friends. We've been lucky enough to have them come stay with us for Christmas Eve and morning several times now and it makes it so much more enjoyable to be able to share the traditions across three generations. I've come to appreciate watching the magic unfold for children as the absolute best part of Christmas, and being able to share that Christmas-morning magic (and chaos) with them adds a lot of extra quality to the holiday for me, and my children... and I think for my parents too. 

This year, though, there was a sad moment on Christmas morning when something happened that I always prayed would never happen with one of my children, tears. I think it was a combination of disappointment that he didn't get the video game system that he wanted and being jealous that his brother got a toy that he wanted. I've had my fair share of disappointing Christmases, so I know how it feels, especially as a child who really isn't equipped to see his blessings in the big picture. It really broke my heart to see him cry this morning, in the midst of so much excitement and joy. He looked so sad and so lonely in his little world of heartbreak, and I felt for him, and remembered that raw sadness that I knew he was feeling. An hour later, he was fine, or so he says, but it's weighing on me that I don't really know how he's feeling now or what he's thinking. I know he feels some guilt over hurting his grandmothers feelings, but I don't know what other hurt he might be carrying. He's a very emotional and sensitive boy, and I always worry about him. Kids like him carry pain without sharing it for fear of embarrassment, especially at his age.

Overall, it was a very successful Christmas, but it really has me wondering about how I can better teach my children to value the right things this time of year, and the rest of the year too. Christmas has become very materialistic and commercial, but maybe it's not too late to change that for my children.